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Do you wish you could decode people? Do you want a formula for charisma? Do you want to know exactly what to say to your boss, your date or your networking partner? You need to know how people work.
As a human behavior investigator, Vanessa Van Edwards studies the hidden forces that drive our behavior patterns in her lab—and she’s cracked the code. In Captivate she shares a wealth of valuable shortcuts, systems and behavior hacks for taking charge of their interactions at work, at home, and in any social situation. These aren’t the people skills you learned in school. This is the first comprehensive, science backed, real life manual on human behavior and a completely new approach to building connections.
Just like knowing the right formulas to use in chemistry, or the right programming language to write code, the hacks in this book are simple ways to solve for people. For example:
· The Social Game Plan: Every party, networking event and social situation has a predictable map – discover how to work a room and the sweet spot for making the most connections. · The 7 Microexpressions: Learn how to speed-read the 7 universal facial expressions and how they can be used to predict people’s emotions. · Conversation Sparks: All conversations can be hacked—if you know how certain words generate dopamine in the people you meet.
When you understand the laws of human behavior you can get along with anyone, and your influence, impact, and income will increase as a result. What’s more, you will improve your interpersonal intelligence, make a killer first impression, and build rapport quickly and authentically in any situation—negotiations, interviews, parties, and pitches. You will never interact in the same way again. *Bonus PDF included with quizzes, graphs, and illustrations.
Do you wish you could decode people? Do you want a formula for charisma? Do you want to know exactly what to say to your boss, your date or your networking partner? You need to know how people work.
As a human behavior investigator, Vanessa Van Edwards studies the hidden forces that drive our behavior patterns in her lab—and she’s cracked the code. In Captivate she shares a wealth of valuable shortcuts, systems and behavior hacks for taking charge of their interactions at work, at home, and in any social situation. These aren’t the people skills you learned in school. This is the first comprehensive, science backed, real life manual on human behavior and a completely new approach to building connections.
Just like knowing the right formulas to use in chemistry, or the right programming language to write code, the hacks in this book are simple ways to solve for people. For example:
· The Social Game Plan: Every party, networking event and social situation has a predictable map – discover how to work a room and the sweet spot for making the most connections. · The 7 Microexpressions: Learn how to speed-read the 7 universal facial expressions and how they can be used to predict people’s emotions. · Conversation Sparks: All conversations can be hacked—if you know how certain words generate dopamine in the people you meet.
When you understand the laws of human behavior you can get along with anyone, and your influence, impact, and income will increase as a result. What’s more, you will improve your interpersonal intelligence, make a killer first impression, and build rapport quickly and authentically in any situation—negotiations, interviews, parties, and pitches. You will never interact in the same way again. *Bonus PDF included with quizzes, graphs, and illustrations.
Due to publisher restrictions the library cannot purchase additional copies of this title, and we apologize if there is a long waiting list. Be sure to check for other copies, because there may be other editions available.
Due to publisher restrictions the library cannot purchase additional copies of this title, and we apologize if there is a long waiting list. Be sure to check for other copies, because there may be other editions available.
Excerpts-
From the cover
Chapter 1
Control
How to win the social game
Once upon a time, a boy named Harry was teased for wearing thick glasses and having a bookish streak. When the time came to apply to college, he took jobs as a timekeeper in a railroad construction company and as a shelf duster in a pharmacy to support his family. No one would have guessed that this shy boy would one day become the thirty-third president of the United States.
The story of Harry S. Truman is surprising because he doesn't fit the stereotypical booming presidential personality. On July 19, 1944, this posed a problem. Truman was facing the biggest opportunity of his career. He was vying for the vice presidential nomination at the Democratic National Convention. The odds were not in his favor. Then-president Franklin D. Roosevelt had already publicly supported his contender, Henry Wallace, a gifted public speaker and the current vice president.
Truman was not a gifted public speaker-and he knew it. His team had to draw the battle off the main stage to make the convention work to Truman's strength: one-on-one rapport building. All day, they pulled delegates into a private, air-conditioned room underneath the platform, called Room H. The convention hall was stiflingly hot, so delegates literally breathed a breath of fresh air as they listened to Truman's pitch and began to cool off. Then he spent hours standing at the end of the hallway, shaking hands with passing members. Instead of waiting for the results in his hotel room (which is what Henry Wallace and most of the candidates tended to do), Truman ordered a hot dog and sat with his wife in the audience.
In the first ballot, Wallace had 429.5 votes and Truman received 319.5 votes. A second ballot was called immediately. Truman had to win friends and he had to win them fast. Instead of making a grand speech, Truman and his team kicked into full gear, working party leaders, delegates, and influential members of the crowd one by one. He worked a solid connection with the right person and then let them convince their people for him.
At 8:14 p.m. the results were announced. Truman led with 1,031 votes to Wallace's 105. He gained 712 votes in a matter of hours. A few minutes later, Truman gave one of the shortest acceptance speeches in history. He stood patiently at the bank of microphones, and when the audience had finally quieted down he said, "Now, give me a chance."
Truman understood his strengths and played to them. He optimized his interactions for success, and so can you.
The Science of Fake
Imagine it's your dream to play professional basketball. You're fast and have great ball-handling skills. You also happen to be six feet two inches tall. You have two choices: You could play center, but the average height of an NBA center is six feet eleven inches. If you went for center, you would have to fake your height by wearing lifts during games and spending a ton of extra hours after practice working on your vertical jump. Or you could play point guard, where the average height is six feet two inches. You wouldn't have to make up for extra inches with your jump-you could just focus on playing.
Feigning extroversion is like trying to play center with lifts on. Trying to socially fake it until you make it burns a whole lot of extra energy and doesn't really work. It also comes across as inauthentic.
In a Science of People survey, we asked 1,036 of our readers the following question:
Which of these people habits annoy you the most?
People who are too talkative
People who are too quiet
People who are fake
People who show off
Can you guess which won? "C....
About the Author-
Vanessa Van Edwards is a researcher, speaker, and writer on people skills and interpersonal intelligence. Her behavior research lab, The Science of People, has been featured in Fast Company, Inc., Men’s Health, Forbes, and on Fox News. She is a monthly columnist for Entrepreneur,the leading instructor in people skills on Udemy and CreativeLive, and has led trainings at a number of Fortune 500 companies around the world. She lives with her husband in Portland, Oregon.
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